Instinct primitif

I have been trying to hone in on my gut instinct, or what other's call, intuition. As I look back on my past I realize how much I ignored that secret fellow. I am going to call him, (yes, him), Prime. Prime was trying to tell me things. I could list the actual situations, what Prime was telling me about them, and how often I ignored him due to my "logical" side winning out every time. But as I get older, I am listening to Prime more and more often and ignoring the logical second guesser. It's taken me awhile to achieve that balance. In fact, I don't think I have paid any attention to Prime until recently. He was starved for attention. And deservedly so.

Let's look at some real life examples. 1) My first relationship was a tense one after the first year. I knew in my gut that it wasn't a good one but ignored Prime waving those red flags in my face because my second guesser was strong. 2) My job in a university was melting down and I knew it. Prime was screaming at me. I just let him-I thought he needed an outlet. 3) My move to my current city was based on an idealistic vision of the love I thought waited for me. Prime hammered at me and I just gave him a block and nails so he could do his thing and I could go on ignoring him. 4) My second real relationship was also full of red flags and Prime was dancing in the living room of my mind; yet, I just let him dance. I knew he was speaking to me through his dance but I went ahead and did my own thing anyway. 5) The goings on with my ex and my children had Prime staring me straight in the face. It wasn't until I finally lost the argument with my intellectual side that I did something about it and when I did, I knew I was on the right track following Prime. 6) My last job was dealing with a crazy person. I thought I could manage. And I did for four years but finally something happened-Prime spoke loud and clear and instead of trying to rationalize, I listened. I took his advice and I haven't felt that unburdened in such a long time.

When I met the man I am dating now, Prime stayed quiet. I kept listening to what he might have to say but he said nothing. I went on my merry way with that man and Prime has still kept quiet. Prime has not shown up in my emotions toward this man and I take that as a very good sign.

So Prime has been trying to lead me for a long time. I know, looking back, how often I ignored him. He must have been hurt. I know I would have been. But he hasn't deserted me. To this day, if a situation comes up, I look to him first, as I realize that he has been with me through thick and thin, and still hasn't left me.

Thank you, Prime. For your patience, your forgiveness, and most of all, your resilience! Moral: Trust your gut. 12/11/2013-Here is a link to an article that talks about our gut instincts: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/5-gut-instincts-you-dont-want-ignore.html